Another story from the Legit Kitchen- an oldie!

This story might come from off the shelf, but only because it took place so recently and was so excruciatingly fun will it be included here! As well, there might be a fairly legitimate recipe to be had- but enough introduction and let the tale begin!

It was a dark and stormy night about three weeks ago (it was actually really sunny, and quite hot in the Legit Kitchen) when it was proposed that a lasagna be made.  A bit of history first, though: four years ago I made my first homemade lasagna from scratch- it was for a girl I was seeing at the time and I knew that it was a make or break time in the relationship. Yes, I was looking to offer her my ‘relationship status’ on facebook- and maybe even get a peck on the cheek from her. (The early 2000s were always so innocent- think: B44) Since that day, I’ve offered my lasagna to numerous women in the hopes of finding ‘the one’, but have wound up only being deceived by the women after finding out they wanted only a piece of my lasagna and nothing else! Feeling like the Trix Rabbit, I’ve had to outwit my opposite sex opponents and withhold my lasagna for truly unique occasions- like Wednesdays, Sundays, or when enough people ask for it at once. The occasion was ripe for a lasagna- that dark and stormy night…

And so the next day, having to work most of it away (mind you I’m not readily sure if I had a job three weeks ago, true, I may have napped most of the day away-) Jordan and I found ourselves hurried and shopping for ingredients at 5pm. We had three hours to construct a masterpiece upon a solemn plate. Both Jordan and I were exhausted after a whirlwind week of moving but nevertheless found in ourselves the passion to provide a glorious looking (and tasting) meal for our friends. Whipping up and down the aisles, we gathered a cornucopia of fresh vegetables that would soon be formed into our special vegetarian lasagna.

Around about two hours and forty-five minutes later, chopping and dicing our way through the heaps of freshness before us, we began to assemble the masterpiece.  As with any fine tale, we were at wit’s end- both mentally and physically- but alas, we triumphed over adversity and sent the lasagna into the depths of the oven, on time.  Soon our friends filled the foyer, tossing coats, purses and bottles of wine in every direction of the dial: Dionysus would have been proud.  Whilst I was assembling the lasagna, Jordan became inspired by the remnants of our fridge and produced a magnificent delight of the senses in a one bite appetizer.  A potluck of frugal goodness ensued, as our friends assembled their contributions and readied them for our eager consumption.

By the time the lasagna burst forth from the oven, the libations had given way to a ravished hunger.  Jordan, the insatiable vegetarian, wolfed down his slice of lasagna between almost quixotic outbursts of ecstasy- almost to the discomfort of our dearest friends.  Continuing upon our steady descent into the lurid Ottawa nightlife, more bottles of wine began popping off the shelf.  Then came pie, ice cream and maple sugar- the one-two punch combo ensuring we were down for good!  Almost unable to bring ourselves to our feet, we settled upon heading down to our favourite Ottawa haunt- Mingles.  Trudging along in fine formation, replete with the knowledge that our stomachs were full of wholesome goodness, we encountered our dear friend Lauren- who having missed out on the night at hand, offered us all she could- a gigantic bottle of wine. (For the record, we would have accepted an apology pro bono, but she insisted, and wanted to come to the bar with us.  We could do nothing but agree with her, and drink her wine on the way.)  As with all the young kids these days, we “got low” and made “love in the club” while “flashing lights” made us all “superstars”.  Unfortunately to my chagrin, no Wu Tang was played that night.

And with great fanfare, here is the recipe for “Dave’s Lasagna”

Dave’s Lasagna

{CENSORED}

Ooops, looks like Big Brother got to it first.

Might as well just come over next time I make it-

Ciao!